4/25/2013

Vivant, bon meets King or, Cher meets Sean Hannity


Today's letter is V, for Vivant, Bon (Bon Vivant) [Cher], who we are matching with the King personality, Sean Hannity.

The Bon Vivant personality, as exemplified by Cher, is more often male than female. Bon Vivants love to live big. They have large appetites for sensual pleasures, and their lifestyles and families are often unconventional. They tend to be airheads. In books and movies, Bon Vivants (and their related personality tpyes: The Salesperson and the Utopian Visionary) are involved in travel and adventure, or are romantic outlaws, eternal youth. Read more about the Vivant, Bon (BonVivant!) personality. 

The King personality, exemplified by Sean Hannity, is also more often male than female, and is often a patriarch, a CEO, an officer in the military. He’s a leader who can change the world. Read more about King-like personalities.  

What might a pairing between a Bon Vivant (Cher) and a King (Sean Hannity) be like? 

Assuming they were  close to the same age and otherwise single/available for a romantic relationship, I can see Sean looking at Cher and thinking, "Yeah, she's a diva," and then quickly turning his attention to more important matters, like debating the budget crisis, gun control, or immigration reform. 

But if not them per se, how might persons of their personality types relate?

Both are assertive, independent, and strong willed. Neither likes to be controlled or limited by others, or even by themselves. For them, being told not to do something is an invitation to do it. Both have big appetites, want a big life, and instant gratification. High energy, staying active keeps the energy supply strong. Adventuresome, they like trying new things. Opinionated, they’re not shy about being heard.

Cher would bring more of a sense of fun and excitement into the relationship, to keep things fresh. The Bon Vivant personality is often talkative as well, and in fact, they are usually wonderful storytellers, even if it means telling tales about their adventures and misadventures.

He would be more reserved and moody, but would be better at facing adversity with courage and staying power.

Independence is a must. Both prefer self-expression to self-improvement. Both look to themselves rather than turning to someone else, when they need support. He will never admit it if she hurt his feelings; it would be a sign of weakness, to his way of thinking. If she’s hurt, she’ll just go and find something exciting to do.

She’s prone to rationalizing, which sounds like a lie to him. He’s very big on truth telling.
When he feels threatened, he tries to control things, but she’d be awfully hard to pin down, especially when a relationship is growing toward love and commitment. If there are issues, she’ll find it easier to walk away than compromise . . . unless she’s grown to truly, deeply care.

When he’s stressed, he goes off by himself to think, but he also loves his privacy and space, even when not stressed.

Both need to find constructive outlets for their high energy. If they don’t, they could bring the relationship down. He might start bullying her, and she would retaliate with insults and contempt. Both can be terribly selfish, and their verbally abusive fights could turn into physical abuse. Both enjoy reckless behavior, and once their relationship reaches this level, it’s hard for them to back down to what would feel like boring behavior. Sometimes pushing the limits can have tragic consequences.   


Additional Information:
What are Instinctual Subtypes?  
Sources from which I collected and synthesized information about the matches 


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